I have been working as a food server off and on since I was fourteen and it never gets any less interesting. This is not about fine dining, its about the flip side of the industry working in the trenches of the massive national restaurant chains. Laugh or cry, people!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Working for You is Like Non-Consensual Anal

The boss is having a little trouble with his food cost and he’s pretty sure the servers are entirely responsible for this. Not because he thinks we’re giving shit away for free. Not because he thinks we’re ringing orders improperly. Not because he thinks the cooks are making us personal meals on the sly.

He thinks we’re taking home food in our purses.

The servers keep their purses on a shelf in full view of the surveillance camera. Or at least, we used to. Now we’re not allowed to keep our purses in the pantry. It’s been suggested we leave them at home, put them in the break room, or lock them in our cars. Not only that, but we can’t keep anything of a personal nature in the pantry at all anymore. No cell phones, no keys, and no beverages.

Here’s what I’m thinking:
What if I lock my purse in my car and put my keys in the break room where we don’t have a surveillance camera? And what if another employee then takes my keys outside and steals my purse out of my car? Or what if they slip a roofie into my unsupervised beverage and then make me steal my own purse?

It doesn’t matter. The point is this is a completely stupid fucking idea. I don’t tell you to leave your asshole wallet in the break room and I don’t want you telling me to put my purse in an unsecure location. What about my bank cards? Ibuprofen? Cold medicine because I have to work when I’m sick?

WHAT ABOUT TAMPONS??!!?? I’m seriously supposed to go to my car to get a tampon in my “free time?”

Not only that, but if the point is to prevent me from putting steaks in my purse, why would you have me move it closer to the walk-in coolers and further from the surveillance camera?

Did your mother have any children that lived?

And do you really think I should just trust my personal belongings to the kitchen employees who do the prep work at a table right outside the break room door? I love me some hard-working Mexicans but passing a background check with a fake name doesn’t entitle you to free access to my check book.

UPDATE: I actually wrote this several weeks ago but I was too pissed to elaborate. Any attempt at discussing an alternative with my GM went nowhere. He would not consider installing lockers in the break room or allowing the servers to keep their purses in the pantry but submit to voluntary purse searches upon leaving the premises. We all started hiding our purses under a bench seat close to the ordering system in the dining room.

He continued to attempt to borrow from the servers the type of items we routinely keep in our purses – like cold medicine and Ibuprofen because the cheap asshole never buys his own. Once he was trying to call a server in to cover a shift and she wouldn’t answer so he asked me to text her from my phone… which I’m not allowed to bring in the building. Dumbass.

And then… Divine Justice sent directly from above.

My GM had his car broken into in our parking lot.

They did not steal his purse because as far as I know, he doesn’t carry one.

But they stole a bunch of other shit.

He stopped talking to us about purses and we started keeping them on the shelf under the surveillance camera again.

I wish I had thought of breaking into his car. I would have done it 3 months ago.

No comments:

Post a Comment